The hidden things

What I'm about to share with you is top secret information. People have been known to disappear for sharing this kind of thing. Musicians have a special talent that they acquire from being performers. When we are on stage and before we go onstage at the early points in our careers we eat food and drink beer and our bodies reject these items at inappropriate times within the middle of songs or announcements between songs. This is quite embarrassing and is sadly the reason many people give up on their dreams. It is quite shameful the number of musicians who never made it because they could not control their gastric explosions. 

Once you perform a certain number of gigs you're invited to attend the courses with the secretive MSGC or Musicians School for Gastric Control. In this school you face a tough set of courses including practicing burping while singing but holding the melody, farting so you don't cause feedback, and the masters course in swallowing small chunks of your burp vomit while starting the chorus to a song. I hope this information is read by all who care for the health and well being of musicians. If I happen to disappear it will be because I have disclosed this very secret information.

Some musicians have mastered the skill of prohibiting bodily functions from interrupting our favorite moments. You will notice these musicians make way to the bathroom extremely quickly upon finishing a set. If you happen to see a musician hop off the stage and move towards the nearest bathroom, leave them be or you will experience a symphony of farts, a concerto full of burps, and a suite of smells from a burp solo to finish it off.

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